Searching for Neverland.

I wrote a I dunno caption a few years ago called Searching For Neverland. it contained a pciture of my favorite shoes at the time (my toe shoes) and a wonderful dicotamous  outlook of searching for Neverland.

I've never been much of a blogger, but there are times in my life when I am and this seems to be one of them. I think often you'll find my blog on my photo journal rather than on an actualy blog, but for soem reason I just feel the need to  throw up on a page and get it over with. It will help me process, help my pray and hopefully make like a tiny bit less complicated.

I've always been the type of person that sees something that she wants and goes after it, and for once in my life I find that all around me has turned to dust.  I feel like I've worked so hard for the things I've always wanted in my life and there they are in a pile of dust over in the corner and I'm left in that place of wondering what will happen now. I'm left wondering what tomorrow will bring and how life will work it out and play its game with me.

Really when it comes down to it, I feel like a grown up in Peter Pan. Its like transitioning out of that 'lost boy stage' where you can feel and almost smell neverland but your nose is cut off because of maturity, and your eyes grow old and weak with age. Depressing I know,  but I feel like I've lost that Neverland hope. i grew up, I'm the adult, its all just imagination now.

Once upon a time, every now and again, I can still see the shores of neverland and my heart aches to go back to that place. To go back to the place where I 'get it right'. To go back to that place of being at peace, to go back to that place of the only worry of the day being whether or not I'll get in a foodfight or walk on the beach.

Our busyness clouds our vision of the important things in life, and I long to find those important things again.  So lift your glass, heres to the constant restless heart search for Neverland, or if you want to use the adult word, Peace, rest, life, hope.

One last thought, what titles in your life are important to you? The ones the outside world gives you? Director, doctor, lawyer, coordinator.. I dunno whatever your title is. Or are the titles that are important the ones that those you love give you. Titles like daughter, son, lover, wife, husband, mom, dad.. whats important to you?